I wrote about my hair earlier. I only talked about the length, but I have a secret to share. A shameful secret! I I have always had a bit of problem with Dandruff. Since last year it just seemed to get worse. Perhaps my ages, changes in hormones and/or stress level caused this. I would round large round white flakes covering my head, my hair roots, and of course they would show up embarrassingly all over my dark clothes. I have tried several different shampoos and hair treatment to combat the problem: head and shoulders, selsun blue, snake oil from Lush etc. I even tried a few home remedies. I tried oiling my hair with coconut oil, and special dandruff target oil. Nothing worked. Dandruff is really a bad problem for us the dark the haired girls. Every time I would touch my hair, those large round white flakes would shed all around me.
A few days ago, I went to the body shop to pick-up their almond hand lotion which was on sale for 10 CAD (a 8.50 CAD reduction). I am a sucker for a good bargain. While at the store, I picked up their ginger shampoo .
According to the website, this shampoo contains Ginger root, birch bark, white willow and oak moss, and honey. I have used this shampoo for four days and I can already see a difference in the amount of dandruff I have :D. I think I finally found a product that works. It also makes my hair look shiny and gives it a healthy glow. For 10 CAD and 250 ml, this product isn’t really that wallet friendly, but if it continues to work I will keep using it. I love the smell of this shampoo. I wish they had a conditioner to go with this shampoo. Now I use the banana conditioner from the Body Shop. While this is a good conditioner, I do not like the smell and consistency of this product. It really feels like mashed up over ripe bananas. Yak!
I hope you give this product and let me know how it works out for you!
Posted in Beauty, Random Thoughts
Tagged almond, bad hair, banana, beauty, birch bark, care, conditioner, dandruff, dark haired girls, flaky, ginger, Ginger root, hair, hair care, hair treatment, hand cream, head and shoulders, itchy, oak moss, product review, scalp. large. round, selsun, shampoo, the body shop, white willow
So my last post was about make-up, especially Kohl. This week I am continuing in the same direction. As I finished my Masters last year, I had a lot of free time and started to explore make-up more. I became fascinated with a day a colour can change one’s face. I love the way how colours play up one’s eyes, can make your eyes stand out, make them bigger etc. Yes! You can probably tell I love eye make-up. I think my eyes are my best feature, and I love dressing them up.
So here is a chance for you to help continue my love affair with make-up and see some exclusive pictures on me. I have entered a contest on smashbox with my video. If I am on the top votes list by Monday, I will get a year of free make-up from smashbox. You can check out my video here, and vote for me. You can also use the link here:
Please vote me and share with your family and friends! Please show me some love. I need it 😀
Posted in Life, Make-up, Random Thoughts
Tagged best eyeliner, eye shadow, eye-liner, help, kohl, life, MAC, MAC cosmetics, make-up, makeup, smashbox
So I guess I have been absent for a really long time. I have been quite uninspired to write for a while. I have been thinking about writing something for a few days now. I am going to write about make-up since I am in the full swing again.
My first experience with make-up was a long time ago. I was probably 6 or 7 and getting ready for a party at my grand-parents’ house. I was probably pestering ammu as she was putting on her make-up, and she lined my waterlines with kohl. I remember looking into the mirror in amazement and thinking that I was oh so beautiful. Kohl has always been a staple in my make-up routine. I wore really thick glasses since I was young, and started to wear contacts occasionally when I was 13. I would seriously feel naked without my glasses, so I started to rim my upper and lower lid with Kohl. Even if I don’t put any makeup on, I still have to tight-line my eyes. I have experimented with so many different kinds over the wear, but finally I found the ones I love and I thought I would share one of them with you:
L’Oreal Voluminous Smoldering Eyeliner in Black: I bought this eyeliner on a whim and instantly feel in love with it. I paid about 10 CAD for it (I think it was on sale). The pencil is short and stubby, and it came it with its own sharpener. If I am doing cat-eyes, I usually resharpened the pencil. The color is very intense and glides on very easily. I found it to be quite water-resistance and lasts me all throughout the day. I can do my eyes under a minute. I will definitely re-purchase this product.
I am seriously in love with eyeliner! Give this product a try!
***So I have a updates to share. Hubby got a job in Canada, and will come back in three weeks! So I am super duper excited.
p.s: disclaimer: I am not being paid anyone for this post. I love to recommend good products and want to try out products that have worked for others.
Posted in Make-up, Random Thoughts
Tagged best eyeliner, black, cheap, eye-liner, eyeliner, jet black, kajal, kohl, L'Oreal Voluminous Smoldering Eyeliner, make-up, makeup, nior, tight-line
In the recent days, much of Canada’s newspapers has been engrossed in the Shafia trials. In this trial Mr Shafia (a wealthy Afghan Canadian Business man), Tooba Yahya (his second wife) and their son Hamed was accused and found guilty of killing four family members. They were Shafia’s first wife Rona (who was childless), and three of Shafia and Tooba’s daughters. They were killed because they did not want to follow the traditional Afghan way of life, had boyfriends and wore western clothes. There killings were labeled as ‘honor killing’ by the prosecutors and the media. The prosecutors brought in cultural experts who supported that claim.Shafia was caught on tape berating his daughters as they had brought shame on the family. The only way to rectify the situation was to kill them.
I was talking to hubby about this and he told me that my views were too western. He said different places and cultures have different norms, and we should respect that. He said what they could do in Afghanistan doesn’t mean that they should do it in Canada. After talking to him for a while, I explained that I was a cultural relativist but not an ethical relativist. I understand that cultures have different morals and standards, but I cannot fathom having different ethical standard.
A crime is a crime no matter who commits it and where it is committed. If a crime is a crime, then why don’t we have universal standards for justice? Are standards of justice and reconciliation different around the world? I guess they are….of course they are. But why? Why can we not agree to standard way of finding justice? Or should we allow cultures to have their own freedom of creating their own notions of justice? If that’s the case,how do we stop “honor killings” from happening?
Posted in Feminism, Random Thoughts, Relationship
Tagged Afghanistan, Afrghan, Canada, crime, cultural relativism, ethical relativism, Hamed, honor killing, justice, murder, relativism, Rona, Shafia, Tooba, trial, universal standard, Yahya
Today started off with a bad news. I found out that Siddqua Kabir passed away. She is the women behind the most well known and widely published Bangladeshi cook book, Ranna Khaddo Pushti ( Cooking,Food, Nutrition). Almost every expat Bangladeshi has this book.
I remember my mother leafing through this book when I was a child. My mother loves to cook and every so often she would open the book and read the recipes. I remembering spending many hot and sweaty summer afternoon with my mother deciding on which recipe to try out. My mother had the older version of the book. She actually had to go and buy a second copy of the cook as the first one she owned was so worn out from use. I loved how the book was dedicated to the malnourished children of Bangladesh. This book had over thousands of recipes. From Bangladeshi regular food to special occasion food, Chinese, Italian, Russian, baking etc. This is the go-to book for cooking.
My used this book when I cooked for the first time. I made Shahi Tukrey when I was 12 or 13. I got a copy of this book when I came to Canada in 2009. My mom got me the newer version of book. After she got me the book, she kept on coming to my room and comparing her book to mine. She realized mine had more recipes than hers. I think, after I left Bangladesh, she ended up getting a copy of the new book as well.
The newer version was printed in a better quality of paper, and included a few recipes that incorporated microwave cooking. I use this book when I am cooking a lot. It literally lives next to my stove. I love how the book gives you a simple and basic recipe for everything.
Siddiqua Kabir also has a very popular cooking show in Bangladesh. I enjoyed watching her on TV. She had a no non-sense attitude towards cooking and always gave information about nutrition. In the recent episodes, I noticed how she would sit down while cooking. I never realized how old she has gotten. To me, she was a timeless woman. I always expected her to be around teaching us how to cook. I am quite sad to find out that she passed away….I know she will be deeply missed by millions of Bangladeshis all around the world.
Posted in Family, Life, Random Thoughts
Tagged Bangla, Bangladesh, Benagli, cook, Cook book, cookbook, cooking, food, mother, Ranna Khaddo Pushti, recipe, Siddiqua Kabir
Yes! I really do…I hate it with a passion. I explored how I got in shape and lost weight with Bikram Yoga.Who wants to exercise when you can curl up with a nice book or a nice movie? Who really wants to exercise when you can dive into a molten chocolate lava cake with vanilla ice-cream? I always quit once I was near or on my goal weight.
Keeping that in mind, I am on a 21 day challenge of doing Bikram Yoga everyday for 21 days. Why 21 days? They say it takes 21 days to form a habit. And I have attempted to start 30 day challenges only to fail. 21 days seem much more manageable. Today is day 7! I have noticed a change in my attitude about going to class. Even on day 3 and day 4, I would sit in the bus and think that I could just keep on ride and go back home. Who wants to go to class? It will make me drench with sweat. It will make me obligated to wash my hair (washing my hair everyday makes it so dry and frizzy), make me obligated to wash my exercise clothes my hand (my apartment has coin operated machines, so it would be stupid to wash a piece or two every day), make me just gross and icky. Yet, I forced myself to walk into the studio and into the class.
Yesterday, I noticed a change within me. I was almost in a zen state even before I got to class. I didn’t have the thoughts of skipping class. I accepted that I have to get to class and I did the best I could in class.
I am also tracking my weight/measurements for the 21 day challenge. I am 5’4”, and here are the result after six classes:
Starting Weight (SW): 142 lbs
Current Weight (CW): 140.5 lbs (BMI 24.1)
Mini Goal Weight: 135 lbs
Overall Goal Weight: 130 lbs
**I will post my measurements once there is a significant change 😛
Now I gotta go and take out mu bikram clothes of the washer and put them in the dryer. Have a wonderful Sunday!
As people around me are having babies, the idea of babies and pregnancy are on mind. I always knew I wanted to be a mother…I feel that I have very strong mothering instinct and am very caring. Hubby thinks we are too young to even thing about babies (I am 25.5 years and Hubby is turning 28 next month). Hubby thinks that babies bring way too much responsibility and we are not ready for it. My mother had me when she was 24. As far as I know, mother-in-law also got pregnant quite young (early 20s). I know that a woman’s fertility goes down by the time she is 27.
If we really want to be settled in life, buy a house, have stable careers, I don’t see us having children till our mid thirties. I know there are loads of options available for women who want to have children later in life after they have sorted out their career. How old is too old to have a baby? Also, the financial cost is probably really high.
I also know the literature that says getting pregnant later in life is much much riskier, both for the mother and the child. A friend of mine just have her baby and she is 35. She had a very difficult pregnancy, had a C-section, very difficult time recovering. Her husband and she had quite a difficult time adjusting to the baby. Her husband is 37. Is there really a biological clock and is it ticking? Is it easier to adjust and make space for baby when we are young?
Ideally I would want a baby in my life in 3-4 years whereas Hubby wants us to wait at least a few more years than that. I know my parents and Hubby’s mom expect us to have a baby, though I have no family pressure (yet).
What are your thoughts on babies? Is there are a right time have babies?
Posted in Family, Life, Random Thoughts, Relationship
Tagged babies, hubby, maternal, maternity, mother, mothering, pregnancy, right time
I hate how really small things can really throw me over the edge now. Yikes! I need to be emotionally more stable and calm. I need to calm down. I need to learn how to breathe and be in the moment. I need to believe. I need to trust. I need to be patient. I really need to work on patience. I want everything now and just the way I like it. I really need to realize I have to work hard for the things I want. It is not going to be handed to me on a silver platter!
People say Bikram Yoga changed their lives. I am on a 21 day challenge where I plan on going everyday (today is day 4). I felt the change within me yesterday.I was just having a crazy wacky day. I heard some bad news and felt awful. I was in a bad mood, and just feeling very anxious and nervous. I forced myself to walk into class even though I dreaded it. But that 90 mins of being present in the moment, and looking at myself really helped. I walked out of class relaxed and just happier.
I hope Bikram Yoga can continue to humble me. Even though my main motivation for doing Bikram yoga is weight loss and getting physically fit, I look forward to accepting all the other benefits that come with it.
I have been thinking about writing this post for a while. Why did I decide to call myself a bou/wife in this blog?
After I got married, I did not take Hubby last name. I am deeply connected to my own name. My first name has a part of my dad’s name, and my last name is my mom’s first name. In essence, I have two first names (SS). It is very musical name :D. That is my formal name (bhalo naam). I also have a nickname (daak naam). Those who have read The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri know what I am talking about. My daak naam is a very Bengali and translates to Rainy Season in English. I was born in during the monsoon season and my name signifies that. My daak naam is used by my family, family friends, friends from my childhood. Most of the time now, when I introduce myself I use my bhalo naam. Even though hubby uses my daak naam , I call him using his bhalo naam (I should really change into using his daak naam).
After I got married people who call hubby Bhai (A respectable term, refers to being an older brother…in Bengali culture we usually don’t refer to people with just their names as it is disrespectful if they are older than you) started calling me Bhabi (Bhai’s wife). People who started to call me Bhabi included my brother-in-law, and hubby’s friends. To my brother-in-law, I asked him to call me apu (older sister). My brother calls me apu and I consider my brother-in-law as my own brother. Using a term like bhabi reinforces the fact I am connected to him by marriage, not by blood. I really don’t want to differentiate between him and my brother. So I prefer that he calls me Apu.
To Hubby’s friends, I always remind them to call me by my name (as most are older than me and some are my age). I want to reinforce that I have my own identity. By allowing myself to be a bhabi, I feel like I exist because there is a bhai or hubby. Whenever I am introduced to new people as bhabi, I always take a stand and correct people. This is, I guess, taking a feminist stand (in my mind).
Considering the fact that I do not like being called a Bhabi, why am I calling myself a Bou (wife) in this blog?
I have spent the last 11 years of my life outside Bangladesh and only had very limited interaction with Bangladeshis. When I married a Bangladeshi guy, my connection to my homeland, my culture and my heritage was reinforced. Becoming a wife allowed me to connect to my culture in different ways. Becoming a wife has also changed me for the better. Becoming a wife has made me very happy as I found an amazing life partner. Being a wife has also become a large part of identity. I know there are certain things I will not do because I am a bou and I know there are things I will do because I am. My relationship with parents have changed because I am married. I have learned to understand life differently since I got married. To appreciate all of those things, I decided call myself a bou as how and what I write about is effected by my marital status.
Posted in Feminism, Life, Random Thoughts
Tagged bhabi, bhai, bhalo naam, bou, daak naam, family relations, Jhumpa Lahiri, name, namesake, wife, wife. bou
I didn’t realize how long my hair had grown until my cousin uploaded a picture of me taken last weekend. Considering I never spent that much time on my appearance when I was young/teenage…most of the time I had really short hair or bad hair. As I am getting older, I realize that the genes are really not on my side. Both my parents have lost most of their hair in their early 30s, so I started to take care of my hair. Avoiding heat products, conditioning it, and just taking care of it. I know compared to other people my hair isn’t that long, but this is the longest I have ever had it.
Now that my hair is this long, I have a crazy idea to put red streaks on my hair. Not the bright red, but more of a brownish red. I talked to my stylist, she told me that as my hair is jet black she would have to bleach it first and then put the color in. I am quite worried about damaging my hair. To all the dark haired girls, did you ever bleach your hair? What was your experience with it?